There’s always a trade off. In every situation there’s something you give up to do something different. It’s not a bad thing, it’s just how things are. If you want to be a dancer, there are commitments you have to make and things you can’t do to make your goal happen. If you want to work out every morning, you’re probably going to need to get up earlier to make that happen. No?
In my case, I moved across the country for career goals and that meant leaving my family in the Midwest to live in Los Angeles. It’s a big trade off. I see my family a few times a year and that works. It got harder when I got married and started a family. I really see the support I’m missing when it comes to being so far away from my family. But, it’s a choice. My husband and I moved here for work and because we’re away from family we know the family we have here is the one we create. That’s our children and our closet friends.
Still, there’s the void of grandparents and cousins. My kids are missing out on that. We do as much as we can when we visit family to make sure they see and get to know as many people as possible. That will also mean more trips back to the Midwest. We’re good with that. My husband and I miss out on some things too. One of them being alone time. Aside from the occasional date night, we don’t have much time alone. A lot of my friends think we should be crazy since we don’t get a lot of alone time. The thing is we feel like it’s what we signed up for. We don’t trust a whole lot of people with our kids. The ones we do trust have families of their own so we don’t want to just throw our two in the mix with what they already have going on. We know we don’t have many options so we don’t focus on what we could be missing.
Then there are the times I talk to friends and they mention the getaways they take with their hubs. We haven’t had one of those since before our son was born. He just turned 6. Leaving our kids in the care of someone else overnight hadn’t been something we’d considered. It feels like too much to ask of someone. That’s where family would come in handy. You can ask family (grandparents) to do things that you wouldn’t ask your friends.
So, we made a plan. My parents usually visit around the holidays. This year I talked to them about coming for Thanksgiving instead of Christmas. The kids were out of school that whole week and they could spend lots of time with my parents. During that week, my husband and I hit the road for a mini-vacay. We took some much needed time to just be us. My parents got to be the doting grandparents that they want to be up close and personal with our babies. It’s a win-win! We enjoyed a few days in Solvang, CA with beautiful art, good wine, and yummy food. Bliss!
There’s always a lesson. This time, I felt like these were things I already knew but needed to be repeated.
- It doesn’t have to be impossible. Whether it be a getaway or a best selling book, what you want doesn’t have to be impossible.
- Focus on what you have while working on what you want. We never considered what we could be missing by not having occasional getaways because they weren’t an option. When we determined that there was a way to make it work (both parents retired, kids are more independent) we made it happen.
- Have a plan. It’s easy to say what we want. The hard part is coming up with a plan and seeing it through. We tend to look at all the things that could go wrong and forget to look at what could go so right.
I’m sure we’ll get a few more getaways in now that we’ve done it and it all went well. It may turn into something that we put on the calendar every year. If my parents actually move here (like they want) then we could definitely make this happen more often. Until then, we’re happy to focus on all we get to do instead of what we could be doing.
27 Comments on Who Else Could Use A Getaway?
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I am always up for a getaway. Fortunately we are able to travel quite a bit in our family. Sometimes with the kids and sometimes it’s just me and my husband.
I can relate to being apart from family. My four adult kids and their significant others (and my granddaughters) live in three other states. Two of them are just one state away (the one with grandchildren, fortunately), but my two oldest live FAR away on the other side of the country. I don’t get to see them very often; in fact, I haven’t seen my son ever since he moved out there several years ago.
K. Lee Banks recently posted…On Giving and Receiving – December 3 Devotions
These are great points. It would be great to fit in a getaway before the holidays. Just a few relaxing days would be nice.
Liz Mays recently posted…Stadium Style | Two Ways
Extended families are really your go-to people when it comes to needed help with the kids. If you’re far away it’s really difficult to get that support. I feel you on this. Glad you’re able to compromise!
Ah!!! I have wanted to go to Solvang for so long – IT HAS TO HAPPEN 10000% now – you just confirmed it for me! 😉
PS: I am in LA too – we should get lunch sometime!
We’re finally at a point where I feel like we can travel a little bit. It wasn’t for me to be on the go with infants and financially our money had to go elsewhere. I’m ready to get my walkin’ boots on now though!
Jessica Harlow recently posted…Leather Nova gives your leather a new lease on life!
This sounds nice. Our wedding anniversary was last weekend, but we haven’t been able to celebrate. I’d love to hit my mom up to babysit, so we could have a little weekend getaway.
Stephanie recently posted…Stuffed Pork Tenderloin
It’s so important for parents to take little getaways for themselves!
Cindy (Prime Beauty) recently posted…It’s Okay to Laugh with Poise Impressa Bladder Supports!
I have never been on a vacation, so anytime to do a getaway is great for me! I’m hoping next year to go for the first time.
ashleigh recently posted…Attend Disney On Ice presents Letâs Celebrate! in Rochester NY: Win Tickets for Opening Day
You are right, everyone could use a getaway. I love your takeaways from this! It’s important that we understand that nothing is impossible, it really doesn’t have to be. More often then not, we make it impossible by getting in our own way! Great post!
Olivia recently posted…3 Ways To Bounce Back From Negativity
My husband and I have been working so hard this year.. We could use a getaway! Need to relax and refresh my mind
rika recently posted…Vital 3 Derm Anti-Aging Moisturizer – Finest Ingredients
You have the right attitude and that’s what makes those getaways so special, because you savor every moment.
Marcia @ Menopausal Mother recently posted…10 Things About The Holidays That Make Me Grinchy
Hubby and I been working so hard. I think we need some rest and vacation. Thanks for sharing.
Nicole Escat recently posted…Track your Belongings with your Smartphone!
Sign me up! I really need a vacation/get-away. I’m in the midst of planning a spa day for myself. I could really use it. I’m going to make that happen.
Cece recently posted…It Really Is About The Journey . . .
I would love a quick getaway with my husband! It may be hard at times considering the kids but a simple date night would do too!
Tatanisha Pitts-Worthey recently posted…Meijer Deal: Score Milk for as low as $1.17!!!
This is great idea, my husband and i were having a dinner date every weekend.
Nikki recently posted…Take a Break from Holiday Madness to Travel Through Time with the Minions!
I think it’s safe to say most of us could definitely use a getaway! I love this!
Adriana recently posted…Rustic Souls
I love that you all focus on what your circumstances are instead of what they could be, or what other’s circumstances are. Sounds like you guys got a chance to have a nice mini vacation!
Jonna recently posted…Curly Girl Shanice Williams Showed Up in NBC’s ‘The Wiz’
Yes, I am always up for a getaway! Lol Awesome post!
I am so grateful for my MIL…or else I would never have the opportunities for getaways.
It’s great that you and your hubby had a wonderful getaway. There’s nothing like the security of knowing that your little ones are being taken care of by family. I totally get what you’re saying here.
My husband and I oh are sooo welcome over due for a getaway. Honestly, the only place we traveled together since being married is Florida. Never had a honeymoon. We have 2 kids so it’s totally hard to get away without that strong family support to keep the bear cubs. Aw, I’m so sad now =( LOL.. Looks very good.
Janelle recently posted…EASY FUN Quick DIY Hair Pin Button Assessory Playdate for Mommy & Her Mini
I totally understand, our parents both leave near us but they have their own lives. They travel and they’re on the go about as much as us. I also don’t trust others with our kids so we don’t get a lot of date nights. We do plan an annual couples trips so we can recharge and the kids can hang with their grandparents.
Mimi “MimiCuteLips” Green recently posted…Chocolate Spoons {WBFF Fox 45 Holiday Crafts Segment}
Love that you were able to get away! And I love the Solvang area. Such great tasting!
Tyra recently posted…Tourism Vancouver Experience Pass: Day 2
My hubby and I have been toying around with the idea of relocating from the Midwest for a long time. Like you we have kids and we’ve thought about all the sacrifices we would have to make if we moved. One in particular is the kids not being able to see their family that they now see on a weekly basis. I love how you and your hubby were able to come up with a plan and have a much needed vacation with each other. GREAT post!
Siobhan
http://www.befreeproject.com
I’m ALWAYS down for a getaway. I try my best to do so at least 4 times a year. It’s only me so I can do that. Staycations are just as good. Glad you guys were able to find some time alone with each other. It’s pretty important in relationships.
Joanna recently posted…Fun Ways To Enjoy the Holidays in NYC
The hubs and I desperately need a getaway. Honestly, I can use a getaway on my own. I love that you say to it’s not impossible. Truly its not. I am adding a plan for me time and couple time to my 2016 calendar and goals.