There have been so many instances where I’ve had to re-group and re-focus to get back to me. Being a mom I need to recharge myself on a regular basis. I have to take time and remember that I’m more than my son’s mom. Though, that’s hard because being his mom is awesome! It’s still necessary to take time for me and to do things just for me.
I had this same shift of focus as a newlywed. In the very beginning of my marriage, I was so focused on my husband and what we were beginning to build that I forgot about my hobbies and likes – for a while. Yes, I was all caught up in love and became “that girl”. My friends didn’t want to ask me to do things at times because I was the newlywed. I didn’t want to to a whole lot for the same reason. We got past that, because It didn’t take long for me to realize that all of that stuff I used to do is all a part of the woman he fell in love with. So I started on my journey of “getting back to me”. There were many things in my mind that would get me back on track to being me again.
Some things that made the list were:
• Lunches with my girls
We made time to hang out and meet for lunch or hit the mall
• Finding events to attend for networking or entertainment
This was a big one for me. I used to be so into going to events where I could network with people in my field and just put myself out there. I was also a fan of going to events happening around the city. It’s L.A. for goodness sake. This city has so much to offer.
• Taking classes
I found online classes to improve my writing and I found other classes that just sounded like fun and signed up!
• Exploring my interests and finding new ones
I got into pilates and started going to a studio. I started a fashion and beauty blog. I was just busy!
I started to get back to myself and our relationship is probably even better for it. We aren’t newlyweds anymore but having our own interests outside of each other certainly helps to grow us individually and as a couple. In the same way, doing things that are just for me has helped me to be a happier and better mother to my son. When my little girl arrives, I know that things will be a bit more hectic and taking that time isn’t going to be easy. I’m hopeful that I’ll still be able to make it happen, even if it’s a “every now and then” deal. At the end of the day, it’s so important to get back to the things that make you… you.
What do you do to re-charge and get back to being you?
I love to get out with the girls. Lunches and dinner along with a drink or three is always fun. I have also started carving out at least an hour in the morning and one in the evening to devote to the things that I like to do.
Adding another to the mix will take an adjustment period but it is really much easier than you think. You aren’t as paranoid about everything.
Mimi recently posted…Weekend Wrap Up
I take time once a day to do something for me. I’ve started taking classes online( writing and photography) and I make sure I MAKE time for these things. I need to start hanging out with girlfriends more too. It’s hard SO hard to re-adjust after spending a couple of years just being Pookah’s mom. But i think I am on my way back!
Rose’s Daughter recently posted…Wordless Wednesday With Words: Why We Love Grandparents….
Sounds like we have similar coping mechanisms! I just blogged the secrets to my sanity earlier this week and it helps me to have things lined up on my calendar to look forward to. It’s great that you’ve identified a key list!
Quiana recently posted…Lil Love Bird’s Silly Cape
I am at a point right now where I need to re boot! I am so looking forward to my BFF coming to visit and hanging out. I also NEED a date night with hubs…{I hear the melting pot restaurant calling our names}.
I have also found that daily exercise rejuvenates me especially when I start into a slump.
Optimistic Mom recently posted…Hormones and Aging ~ by a Four Legged Mom
When I want to get out of stuck or reboot, I always try to step out of my comfort zone and do something unusual. If we can switch the view, that’s a great way to reboot and get some inspiration and motivation.
Kathi recently posted…Abenteuervolle Erlebnisse in Murau
I liked this because like you, I felt lost in all things “everybody else” and I just took 3 months off of everything and just enjoyed my family and regrouped. When I came back to life, LOL!, I started BernettaStyle blog and when I feel too overwhelmed, I just take a deep breath and say this is LIFE. I can miss this or that. I can’t go to every event. There will be a next time and I will be ok. But you can’t forget you! Gotta take care of yourself.
BernettaStyle recently posted…15 Random Things About Me…..
I love hiphop so when the baby was 5 months I went to a concert of one of my fave groups and I felt like my old self. That was really my first time out after having a baby. On the reg, I just need some me time!
Baby Shopaholic recently posted…Booze + Ballet + Flowers
I would love to take a class!! Usually for me recently it’s been
about blogging and getting manicures and pedicures just to self
Care!!
That’s so important! I’m not married, but when I’m dating someone (and even as Aiden’s mother), I am VERY big on having my time for me to do…. whatever I want! Dinner with my gals, brunch with the homies, vacations… you name it! It means SO much to me to be able to maintain that part of me.
Alicia @MommyDelicious recently posted…An Important Reminder
I run on my lunch break, sometimes with some lady friends from the office and sometimes by myself.
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Hi Cam, I’m your newest follower.
I have to say that I am at that point in my life now where I’ve realized I needed to find “me”. being mrried with 3 kids I definitely felt liek I lost myself along the way and was feeling “burnt out”. Taking a class towards getting my MA in Art History was the first step and I LOVED every minute of it.
Karen recently posted…RIP Donna Summer
Time alone is what recharges me. Without it, I’m not sure I’d survive! But scrapbooking is where I love to spend the most time. 🙂
Liz @ A Nut in a Nutshell recently posted…Open Mouth, Insert Mushed Up Worm Stuff – WW
Whenever I find myself getting easily frustrated, I know it’s time to reboot
Just driving alone or going grocery shopping by myself does it for me. I know I know, I’m pretty lame.
This Cookn’ Mom recently posted…Let Me Explain
My husband gives me “me days” where he takes the boys and lets me do whatever I want. Lunch/dinner with the girls, shopping, etc. Sometimes I just sit at home with my laptop and a glass of wine and enjoy the quiet. Without these days I would go insane.
Barbara recently posted…Love and acceptance
Girls’ trips help me every time! I loved to take trips with just my girlfriends before I got married and I wasn’t going to give that up. Even if it’s just a few hours away, I still need that bonding time with my girls.
I meet with old co-workers for lunch once a month.
Also, just a solo trip to the hair or nail salon or to the mall helps me a lot.
Jenni recently posted…How Do You Make Friends?
I re-charge/re-boot by exercising or spending time with my dear friends or my husband. I think it’s so important to do these things because they serve to remind me of what matters most.
Jessica recently posted…I want to be here when I’m here
Usually I take a day off of work to just chill. Or I go to book club with the girls… thank goodness I have an understanding hubby that understands I need balance of me and home life to remain sane! 😉
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