They say self-love is the best love and it’s true. The question I have though, is why it is often so hard to do. We freely give love away every day. Whether it be to our kids, spouses, or friends – we give. Many times, we don’t give, we give until we’re depleted. The thing is, that’s easy. The hardest part for so many of us is showing ourselves the same love we show others. Think about it. How often do you intentionally show yourself love? I have a fitness instructor who always says, to treat your body like it belongs to someone you love. I’m gonna ask that we take it further and treat our whole selves to the love that we dole out to others. How? I’m glad you asked.
Ways to Love You
One way to always speak love over yourself is positive affirmations. I share one every morning here. It’s a great way to set the tone at the top of the day. Speaking well of yourself – to yourself – is never a bad idea.
Another way to say “I love you” to yourself is to set boundaries. I won’t tell you that it’s always easy to do or that it will feel good right away. People’s feelings may get hurt sometimes when they’re met with a boundary. People are used to having a certain level of access to you. When you’re doing what’s best for you everyone won’t like it – do it anyway.
Simply put, move your body. Taking care of your body by feeding it good stuff and moving on a regular basis is a must. Be curious about what your body can do. And in the words of my instructor, “Treat your body like it belongs to someone you love.”
Another idea that I love is to create personal days on your calendar that mean something to you. You can start with “The day I chose myself” or “The day I set a boundary for ____”. Fill your calendar with days that remind you of your growth or things that have value for you.
I am a music girl. I can easily get lost in my playlist and listen to music for hours. Music is my feel-good elixir. My fave might be 90s R&B if I really wanna bring on the good memories. Find your feel-good playlist and allow it to take you to some of your best memories.
Let It Ring
A word of advice: let the phone ring. You don’t need to feel bad about missing a call. There was a time when we weren’t accessible to everyone 24/7 and it was okay. It’s perfectly fine to talk to someone when you can actually focus on the conversation anyway.
It is totally fine and you are not arrogant to think well of yourself. That’s something I had to learn. I grew up being taught only humility it seemed and never really explored what it was like to puff out my chest with pride in myself. I learned that it’s great for others to be proud of you – but YOU have to be proud of you. And there’s nothing wrong with that.
I was reminded recently to celebrate the wins. Often times we don’t acknowledge them and keep moving through life. So let me remind you like I was reminded to take time to celebrate the things you accomplish. You’re worth a little (or big) confetti party. Be Snoop for a minute. Thank yourself for all the things you’ve accomplished and how hard you’ve worked to get there.
Who are you? Take time to think about who you are outside of the titles you carry. Take time to think about all the things you love about you. Maybe write it down as a reminder when you feel like you belong to everyone else but yourself.
How do you love yourself?
